Now that I have two kittens, do I have to be afraid they're gonna die because of you incessant masturbators out there?
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Re: HEY!
Thu, May 6, 2004 - 8:28 AMjust don't tell anyone their names and no one will "aim" for them. -
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Re: HEY!
Thu, May 6, 2004 - 4:25 PMAAAAAaaaaa HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA !
AAA HA HAAAaaaaaa! -
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Unsu...
Re: HEY!
Thu, May 6, 2004 - 4:33 PMEverytime someone masturbates, god kills a kitten with a spooge wad aimed right for the kitten?
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Unsu...
Re: HEY!
Thu, May 6, 2004 - 4:33 PMDid you just have a masturbatory inspired orgasm, Zihmian! Damn you! I'm not even home to check if my kittens are still alive! -
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Re: HEY!
Thu, May 6, 2004 - 5:01 PMno no... I've been getting laid way to frequentlt latly to bother to masterbate... but that was just funny as hell! -
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Re: HEY!
Thu, May 6, 2004 - 5:20 PMWhat if you get jacked-off by somebody else? -
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Unsu...
Re: HEY!
Thu, May 6, 2004 - 5:52 PMBy a Jack Officer, perhaps? Interesting question.
I think in that case the blood of the kitten is on the hands of the jacker, not the offer. -
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Re: HEY!
Thu, May 6, 2004 - 6:08 PMWhy does getting laid have to rule out masturbation? They each have their glory, I say.
(But I DO love the kittens though. I feel so conflicted...) -
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Re: HEY!
Thu, May 6, 2004 - 6:14 PMnothing stopping you from masterbating during a solid week of sex I guess... other than exhaustion and privacy issues..... plus think of the kittens. -
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Unsu...
Re: HEY!
Thu, May 6, 2004 - 6:19 PMSometimes I masturbate MORE, I mean, my friends masturbate more when they're getting lots of sex.
I -- I mean THEY never thought about the kittens until I got some... -
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Re: HEY!
Fri, May 7, 2004 - 9:29 PMI like to think the kittens I am disposing of are far, far away. Like the starving children in China thing, you know when you didn't eat all your vegetables at dinner? So, to keep from breaking my own heart, I try to aim at random kittens somewhere where my selfish act of self-stimulation can ease the suffering of starving, toddler felines... -
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Re: HEY!
Sat, May 8, 2004 - 5:09 PMKitten salad I suppose... I am a horrible, horrible person.. -
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Unsu...
Re: HEY!
Mon, May 10, 2004 - 2:24 PMthen what are we doing in this tribe if we're gonna masturbate? -
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Re: HEY!
Mon, May 10, 2004 - 2:28 PMIs it suicide to get jacked-off by a kitten? -
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Re: HEY!
Mon, May 10, 2004 - 4:04 PMsorry random kitten; It was god's will.
I promise there was no aiming involved. -
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Re: HEY!
Mon, May 10, 2004 - 4:13 PMmasterbation doesn't kill kittens.
God kills kittens.
Jehova is one twisted bastard! -
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Unsu...
Re: HEY!
Mon, May 10, 2004 - 4:23 PMBlame it on God. That's what I always do when in doubt. It's not that masturbation is bad; it's that God is bad!
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Re: HEY!
Mon, May 10, 2004 - 4:26 PMNope. There is scientific proof that for each self manipulated orgasm, the world's population of cute, fluffy, playful kittens decreases by one. It's a big conspiracy, being covererd up by playboy and penthouse. and George Bush isn't gonna go anything until his scientists have figured a way to harness the energy of the kittens to produce power. THEN, the real truth behind their fucked up sex education methods will come out.
so to speak. -
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Unsu...
Re: HEY!
Mon, May 10, 2004 - 4:29 PMI thought the kittens were disappearing, along with children, because the aliens who live under the ground like to eat them. They like them the best cus they have less toxins in them.
No? -
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Re: HEY!
Wed, May 12, 2004 - 1:30 PMDoes this mean that if Bush figures out how to harness the energy of kittens killed via self-pleasure that we're going to go to war with every country that won't let us have their kittens for a steal? This kitten energy could very well lead to the end of our world as we know it, human killing human for the power of the kitten he/she kills with their hobby? Sounds like a dog conspiracy to me...
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Re: HEY!
Thu, May 13, 2004 - 3:30 PMdamn, you could prolly have gotten the help of the owner to save two kittens at once...
tis a sad day... -
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Unsu...
Re: HEY!
Thu, May 13, 2004 - 3:36 PMHere kittie kittie kittie.
Ack! I'll get that other one soon enough. -
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Re: HEY!
Thu, May 13, 2004 - 3:41 PMThe question is, is do they expire on a per act, or a per orgasm basis? -
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Unsu...
Re: HEY!
Thu, May 13, 2004 - 4:44 PMwho cares?
Those little fuckers are quick!
HAHA, good think I've got the trusty toys!
Have no fear, the dead kitties are near. -
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Re: HEY!
Fri, May 14, 2004 - 4:02 PMIf we're talking kittens dying via spooge flying, then per orgasm, but frankly I am a believer that if you are going to masterbate, at least finish, its the right thing to do.
No toys needed here.. as long as I've got motor function in either arm! -
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Unsu...
Re: HEY!
Tue, May 18, 2004 - 7:10 PMwell, toys help to take the kitties out faster. Efficiancy, you see.
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Re: HEY!
Tue, June 22, 2004 - 1:28 AMIf anyone aims at my kittens, you're dead! Do you hear me? Dead! God will strike YOU down! -
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Re: HEY!
Wed, June 23, 2004 - 5:59 PMI'll try to close my eyes, or maybe cross them, when I'm almost finished. That might save your kitten from being in my line of sight. Pity the next one...
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Re: HEY!
Wed, June 23, 2004 - 7:26 PMThat's not funny, boychaos! :P
I thought this tribe was supposed to be AGAINST masturbation -- not for it! -
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Re: HEY!
Wed, June 23, 2004 - 8:09 PMNo, the kittens are against the masterbation. We're definitely not. Hell if I knew that every time a tomcat blew a load I'd be at risk of dying I'd be against it.
But, y'know, gettin off feels good, so a few lost kittens isn't even gonna slow me down.... -
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Re: HEY!
Wed, June 23, 2004 - 9:07 PMYou should work for an animal shelter. That way you'd get PAID to masturbate and euthanize kittens.
Don't forget to spay or neuter your pet! ;D -
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Unsu...
Re: HEY!
Wed, June 23, 2004 - 9:08 PMfab idea! i'm going to look for part time work. hell i'll even volunteer.
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Re: HEY!
Wed, June 23, 2004 - 10:29 PM> Don't forget to spay or neuter your pet!
Yeah, you get lots of funny looks if you have to admit you knocked them up... -
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Re: HEY!
Thu, June 24, 2004 - 10:15 AMnope. I only posted once. The universe itself felt so strongly about the truth and validity contained there in, that it echoed it for all to hear.
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